Imposter Syndrome
An old post of mine from 2021 that is still relevant today
Let's talk a moment about "imposter syndrome" because wow is it hitting me hard right now. You ever start getting praised about something and think "they can't be talking about me, right?"? Feeling like you're just faking your way through life.
Lately, I've been getting feedback in quite a few areas of my life regarding my writing. I had a family member call me one day just to tell me how much they enjoy my writing and how I should find a way to increase my visibility. I told her about this page and that part of the reason I have it is to maybe find a way to combine my passion for activism with my love of writing (and yes, Iām hoping to someday earn income from my writing as my health is limiting my earning capacity and I enjoy things like food and shelter š.)
As a nanny, I had a woman who runs a website/agency for parents and nannies pay me a modest consulting fee to add clauses that I wrote to her professional nanny contract (a huge draw to her business and a significant source of traffic to her site). Her personal and professional reputation are on the line with that contract, and she wanted *me* to contribute??
I had another person follow me on my personal facebook page after connecting through an author we both admire and tell me how much they enjoy what I have to say. They then began following on this page and even asked if I have a patreon or anything so they can help support my writing. (I do not as of yet, because I'm not even sure how to go about it. And of course my imposter syndrome is telling me I'm arrogant for even thinking I should š)
I often give advice or suggestions in groups I'm in with overwhelming positive feedback. I've been playing with words since I was a child. I play with words like other kids painted or built with blocks.
I get called an inspiration, a mentor, a role model
And yet with all that I project confidence, part of me goes "they can't be talking about me. I'm nobody". I tell you all each day how special and valid and important you are, but even in the face of incredible and humbling compliments and feedback, I still think Iām not good enough. That they are just being kind. That I'm ridiculous for thinking anyone wants to hear what I have to say. And especially who on earth would PAY me for this? I'm just a nobody and who really cares?
I say all these things to myself while encouraging others to see their worth, to value themselves. Because I do believe in it. It's just hard to apply the same lessons to myself.
So if you're wondering if you're good enough. If you feel like people are just being kind by complimenting you. If you think you're an imposter. You're not alone.
I have a facebook page that has grown to over 1000 followers in a year (despite an unexplained restriction thanks to Facebook algorithms) and staggering positive feedback, but I still feel like an imposter**
So i'm going to tell myself to shut up. I'm going to tell that inner voice that tells me I'm not good enough to go fuck itself. I'm going to tell myself I AM good enough. I AM worthy. Because I am. And the more I say it, the more I will believe it until I truly see my worth.
So are you. So are all of you. And if you need someone to tell that voice to shut the hell up: šš”š®š š®š©. šš'š«š š§šØš š„š¢š¬ššš§š¢š§š ššØ š²šØš® šš§š²š¦šØš«š.
We are worthy
So in the spirit of combating that voice, tell us something you're proud of. Tell us the last compliment you received. show us what makes you special. (and yes, link your page or business or whatever. if you're proud of it, so are we!)
Show us how you shine in the comments below
** Added 20 October 2023
My FB page has grown from 1000 to over 11,500 followers in just two years, I have begun this Substack, and my private FB group, Libby's Loudmouths has grown to nearly 600 members! And I STILL struggle with that balance between being humbled and grateful for all of the support and positive feedback, feeling confident in what I do, and yet still have imposter syndrome all the damn time. It's a curse š¤£